Joel: I can't see anything that I don't like about you.
Clementine: But you will! But you will. You know, you will think of things. And I'll get bored with you and feel trapped because that's what happens with me.
Joel: Okay.
Clementine: Okay.
Breaking the trend of the whirlwind romance is hard when it comes to film- we're always looking for an escape from the ugly truths of life, and a trip to the movies often offer that opportunity. Not many audience members want to see the flaws of their last relationship blown up on the big screen, every fight inevitably leading to the heartbreaking mess that led them to the theater in the first place. But Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind does just that, and it doesn't make it alienating or hard to watch (though sometimes its intimacy to our own lives is disconcerting), it makes it unforgettable and the most honest romance film made in years.
It's clear from the first time(s) Clementine and Joel meet that they're complete opposites, but each offers what the other needs. Joel, with his knit cap and 5 o'clock shadow, is untrusting and vulnerable, doodling absentmindedly in the margins of his notebook and internally lamenting: "Why do I fall in love with every woman I see who shows me the least bit of attention?". Clementine, in contrast, is almost annoyingly gregarious, with a free spirit and expressively dyed hair. At first, the theory of opposites attracting is what holds the relationship together, but over time the imbalance is what leads to their emotional split. That's lesson number one: having stuff in common has nothing to do with love. Most romantic comedies roll the credits just after the big kiss, maybe showing a little 5-minute flash forward into the relationship, but they never go past the end of the honeymoon phase- the sweet little frame of time before you really start to see your significant other for who they are- for better or for worse. But Eternal Sunshine shows this next phase masterfully, from bitter remarks about hair left in the shower to the outgrowing of immature quirks once found endearing. Joel and Clementine grow within their fabricated relationship, and as they grow, they find themselves confined by it. The first time around, they see this as the end, and break up, each going their separate (but not too separate, as they both end up at Lacuna) ways. But the movie is saying something more positive about this period of time: though the end of the honeymoon phase may bring fights and strain to a relationship, it's the only way you can get to know someone- it's how we get to know our two protagonists. Every character who has gone to Lacuna wishes they could undo the erasing process. The memories, no matter how painful, helped make them who they are.
Around the time I first saw Eternal Sunshine, I was with a boy who was a lot like the male version of Clementine. He didn't dye his hair wild neon colors, but he was adventurous and impulsive, and as it turned out, vindictive. We even watched this movie together, but for some reason neither of us realized the incredible similarities between us and Joel & Clementine. Unfortunately, or probably fortunately, we chose to break it off when it became apparent we weren't exactly a match made in heaven, and cut off enough contact to make it feel like I had actually erased him from my brain. What makes the ending so great (and better and different from (500) Days of Summer), is that Joel and Clementine are willing to rebuild a relationship destined to fail because every time they try, there's the possibility of getting closer to perfect.
It's clear from the first time(s) Clementine and Joel meet that they're complete opposites, but each offers what the other needs. Joel, with his knit cap and 5 o'clock shadow, is untrusting and vulnerable, doodling absentmindedly in the margins of his notebook and internally lamenting: "Why do I fall in love with every woman I see who shows me the least bit of attention?". Clementine, in contrast, is almost annoyingly gregarious, with a free spirit and expressively dyed hair. At first, the theory of opposites attracting is what holds the relationship together, but over time the imbalance is what leads to their emotional split. That's lesson number one: having stuff in common has nothing to do with love. Most romantic comedies roll the credits just after the big kiss, maybe showing a little 5-minute flash forward into the relationship, but they never go past the end of the honeymoon phase- the sweet little frame of time before you really start to see your significant other for who they are- for better or for worse. But Eternal Sunshine shows this next phase masterfully, from bitter remarks about hair left in the shower to the outgrowing of immature quirks once found endearing. Joel and Clementine grow within their fabricated relationship, and as they grow, they find themselves confined by it. The first time around, they see this as the end, and break up, each going their separate (but not too separate, as they both end up at Lacuna) ways. But the movie is saying something more positive about this period of time: though the end of the honeymoon phase may bring fights and strain to a relationship, it's the only way you can get to know someone- it's how we get to know our two protagonists. Every character who has gone to Lacuna wishes they could undo the erasing process. The memories, no matter how painful, helped make them who they are.
Around the time I first saw Eternal Sunshine, I was with a boy who was a lot like the male version of Clementine. He didn't dye his hair wild neon colors, but he was adventurous and impulsive, and as it turned out, vindictive. We even watched this movie together, but for some reason neither of us realized the incredible similarities between us and Joel & Clementine. Unfortunately, or probably fortunately, we chose to break it off when it became apparent we weren't exactly a match made in heaven, and cut off enough contact to make it feel like I had actually erased him from my brain. What makes the ending so great (and better and different from (500) Days of Summer), is that Joel and Clementine are willing to rebuild a relationship destined to fail because every time they try, there's the possibility of getting closer to perfect.
But Joel and Clementine aren't the only couple in the film. In the background is Mary Svevo's loose relationship with coworker Stan, despite her clear infatuation with her much older boss, Dr. Mierzwiak. If you haven't seen Eternal Sunshine, you should probably stop reading this for inherent spoilers, but it would be unfair to ruin the magic of their group dynamic. In the end, Mary's choice is the one most people choose to make in their own, very real relationships. Not everything can be rebuilt, and even if it can, sometimes it's easier for everyone involved just to walk away. |
There are a million reasons to love this film. The superb script thanks to Charlie Kaufman. The authentic performances from Kate Winslet and Jim Carrey. The cutely surreal vision of Michel Gondry. But I love it because it perfectly captures what a modern relationship is. It's not love and sunshine all of the time, but it's not hell either. Committing to another person is challenging at times, immensely rewarding at others, but if this person really means something to you, you'll stick it out just to be with them. It's not sad or cynical, it's a celebration of real life.
I don't know, a quote wasn't enough to really capture the essence of the last scene. It's the summation of everything discussed previously.